giant toothbrush



nothing gets to me more than a giant toothbrush

well, maybe, a giant tooth



plastic fruit



i really love plastic fruit and ice cream
especially when they make the crushed ice

i think i even like it better
than real ice cream

i mean

it is great

and it lasts

forever

my sister



she said she made dinner for 12 people
and then she said

thank god for control-top panty hose

i don't know why i think this is so funny
but i am guessing it is because it is linked
with another story about pantyhose

and an ex-boyfriend who called the police
on himself

brendan



my friend brendan
wore this shirt the other day

and i am still reeling from it

brendan is a really pretty person
the kind you would like
to be friends with forever

because he is real funny but at the same time
he always gives you
a straight answer

plus
as evidence suggests

he is a real sweet dresser

7 things

fuckin pop rocks
dust
laser beams
platform shoes

ether
sabotage

tinsel

marshmallows



i would like to lie in a bed of marshmallows
or at least make shoes from them

or a hat or a chair

black feeling



sometimes i get this black feeling
in my body like it has

evaporated but

something heavy is still
holding me down and

my throat cannot make noise like
in those dreams
where you scream but

no sound is emitted

only butterflies

flutter

out